Maria Bartolotta: Crafting a Solo Show and Life with Patches

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In this episode, Gemma chats with Maria Bartolotta, a talented purr-former who is a regular at the Catbaret, a cat-themed variety show. They explore Maria’s journey in creating her solo show, I've Grown Plenty, Thanks, which recently premiered at the Hollywood Fringe Festival. With over a decade of versatile performance experience, Maria discusses how her art reflects real-life experiences and connects with audiences. Alongside her artistic journey, Maria shares stories about her beloved rescue kitty, Patches. Tune in to hear about Maria’s creative process and her life with her emotionally available feline friend.

Links:

• Follow Maria on IG: @maria_bartolotta_1
• Follow Maria on TikTok: @avemaria869 
• What is a Korat Cat?
• Automatic Feeder with Cooler

Get in Touch:

• Instagram: @tailsandtasselspod, @gemmasmithnyc
• Come to the Catbaret on 10/31 in NYC! 
• Email us at TailsandTasselsPod@gmail.com
• Leave a comment below

Transcript

It's like with the men that you date, you've found many that are emotionally unavailable, but you have a very emotionally available cat. He's very, he's very attached to me. can't.

Hello Kitty Cats and welcome to Tails and Tassels, the show where we chat with burlesque and nightlife performers about their craft, their cats, and how the two worlds collide. I'm your host Gemma Smith. By day, I'm an animal advocate, and by night, I host the Catbaret, a cat-themed variety show in New York City.

Join us for an exclusive backstage peek into the lives of performers and their kitty cats, filled with juicy stories and perfect tips for cat parents and creatives alike. Today, we are going to chat with fellow performer and cat mom, Maria Bartolotta. As a professional performer with over a decade of versatile experience, Maria's passion is reflecting real life through art.

whether it be a well-known musical, an obscure play, an 80s cover band, an improv show, or a comedy set of her own creation. Her goal is to resonate with people and let them know they are not alone in this crazy world. And fun fact, Maria played Lisa Vanderpump as well as many Bravo Leopardies from Vanderpump Rules in our burlesque parody show. And she's recently back from LA performing her solo show, I've Grown Plenty Things at the Hollywood Fringe Festival.

She also has a very adorable, loving, maybe attached rescue kitty named Patches. Thank you so much for being here, Maria. my gosh, I'm so excited to be here. Thanks for having me, Gemma. Anytime. Now, our listeners may not know this, but Maria was my roommate once upon a time when she first moved to New York. So tell us a little bit about your background and how you got started in burlask or nightlife.

performance. Yeah, absolutely. So I'm from St. Louis, Missouri, originally in the Midwest. I was a musical theater major. I did my college internship in New York and lived here for the summer and knew that I had to live here. How I got involved in nightlife performing, I kind of attribute to two people. One of them is my friend Dom, who I was on his podcast last year.

But he told me this story of like what kind of inspired him to like bring me in on these like performance opportunities. But basically it was my senior year of college and I was in like a really dark spot. I was about to graduate like never really getting a lead role in a show. But Dominique was one of my closest friends and he saw all this happening and he was just starting his

entrepreneurial efforts as a nightlife performer. And he was like, I'm going to do this show and I'm going to involve Maria so she can see that there's like life outside of, you know, musical theater and auditions and all this stuff, like we can create our own thing. So he made the Sammy Davis Jr. and Liza Minnelli cabaret. Wow. I don't think I about this.

Yeah. And invited me to be Liza, obviously. And then and he was obviously Sammy. And he was like, I want to do this cabaret. We do. And I was like, yeah, of course. And so we did that show. And yeah, he I never knew that like his inspiration was to like get me out of this rut of thinking that it was leading the show or nothing, you know, and that you can like create your own way. And there's other avenues of

performing, the other person I would attribute to it is you. wow, okay. Because like other than that, doing that with him, like I really didn't do much outside of my shows with him until I moved here and you started having me do stuff in Cat Beret and like you said, like

We were roommates. literally found you on Facebook. I was thinking about this the other day actually about like how random it is and like how, you know, it's like so much of my New York life is like so attributed to this and my relationship with you. But yeah, I found you on Facebook, the apartment posting and you were doing caperay and the first one you asked me to sing at, you know, I had performed in a few of those and then I...

made my way into like the burlesque, making appearances in the burlesque shows. And then, you know, after being in New York for a few years, realizing that again, like I did in college, the theater route where it wasn't necessarily it. Yeah. So that's kind of how I ended up in that. Sore. But yeah, you two are definitely like.

the big contributors to that. Well, I'm honored to be a part of that. And I can say it's really relatable, I'm sure, for a lot of people who went to school for theater and may still be in school for theater. Like, I hear you say, like, look, I was in school for theater. This was my passion. I was giving it my all and I wasn't getting any lead roles. And I think that's actually not uncommon. I've talked to a lot of people here in New York City who are so talented, so awesome, creating their own work and projects because if the opportunities aren't there...

I think it's so empowering to create them for yourself, which you've really done also with your solo show right now. I've grown plenty things. Like, where did that idea for that come? So again, Dom making his own shows and being like, hey, you can do this. That's I think that's where the initial seed was planted. But honestly, the inspiration for the show came.

from a million years ago when I was using dating apps back in like 2014, 2015, and my messages were so terrible that, and this was before TikTok existed. This is before like all the girlies were like making videos and making money off of it. I was posting my crazy messages on Instagram and my friends were obsessed with them. Like anytime I'd like take a break and then go back.

to posting them again, they'd be like, yes, they're back finally. And then I've always had a very uneventful, eventful love life. I've only had two relationships in my entire life. I don't like date very often, but I always end up in these like wild situationships. Again, everyone's always so entertained by them. They're like, you have to do something with this. And I specifically remember after one happening that's in the show,

being like, maybe I am going through these things and I'm supposed to like do something with this content. And so I actually wrote a pilot for like a web series or something. was, it was originally like in screen form in my brain. And then Fleabag came out and I was so inspired by Fleabag and I was like, this is what I want to do. This is everything. This is exactly what I want. And I was like, okay, so like, this is what I'm inspired by. This is like,

what the trajectory I want this to go. And this was in like 2019, 2020. But then like, you know, I come from the theater world. Like I didn't have, I don't have a lot of experience with film and TV. Like I didn't know how to go from point A to point B. So I kind of had it like on the back shelf for a while, had a bunch of, bunch more.

situation, ship experiences and one relationship. More inspiring, more inspiration, more content just kept coming. And then January twenty twenty three, I had just spent a long time home in St. Louis for the holidays. I just really started singing again because there was a while where I wasn't singing because I was going through some stuff with my voice and like anxiety and stuff. And so I was really starting to sing again.

And a friend of mine from St. Louis was doing a cabaret here in New York. And I went to see it and I was so inspired by it and it was so well done. And I was like, you know, I'm singing it. I'm starting to sing again. I just spent like all this time in St. Louis. I should like do a cabaret in St. Louis when I'm home for the holidays. And then all of sudden everything just clicked because Phoebe Waller-Bridge, the creator of Fleabag, started

that as a one woman show. And I was like, my God, I can like make my show a one woman show. And it all just kind of like clicked into place. And that's kind of how it was born. I feel like that's a really exciting moment that creatives experience, right? When everything just clicks and you feel in your gut, like this excited feeling and.

For our listeners, Maria and I are in a monthly actor accountability group where we meet up and we share ideas. And Maria, when you shared this, and I feel like it didn't take you that long from the time you told us the idea to the time the show was happening. But I remember all of us noticed your excitement and we could see this was your purpose. So remind me, how long was it from the time this happened when you were like, cabaret?

to when you actually scheduled the show and then when the schedule was. Cause I think you scheduled it before you even had a show. Correct. It's by far one of the craziest things I've ever done. And it's so wild because I didn't think twice about it. And so like any time I'm like super scared, like right before LA when I was like freaking out and scared my therapist and like my friends kept having to be like, Maria, you literally booked a venue before you had a show written.

That was way scarier than this. So the idea happened in January. I started like looking for venues in like the spring, like April. And I think the venue got booked in May. And the date was for that following December. Wow. I love that. Like, see, I don't I know it sounds kind of crazy and wild and it probably is for a lot of people.

But I think that's how you made it happen because you booked the venue and you said, I'm going to do this. And you did. Yes. That's literally what that's was the brain framework. I'm like, OK, if I booked this venue, then that means I have to like see this through and I have to do it. And then everything for like that round with the first round of it just happened so seamlessly. And like it was wild how like almost not cosmic, but like, you know, like like the universe was kind of like here.

do this. Yeah, the universe was conspiring to help you. like to think of things like that. Because you did this all on your own. Like you wrote the script or the book and then you rehearsed at home and you did have people over and Patches may have been your main audience for a while, correct? He was. He was my main audience member until you guys, our actor group, saw it. And that was honestly the hardest part about it all.

This was all stuff in my brain and me in my apartment with Patches until a month before the show when you guys watched it. Until then, I was like, wait, what if this isn't good? What if in my head this is amazing? And then people are like, I had no idea until you guys watched it. And that was a month and some change before the show. Wow, that is wild. And thank God it was good.

Thank God. you still do need like feedback and direction. And so it's really great that you had a bit of that. And then you got even more clarification and feedback when you did it in St. Louis, right? You did two shows. Yes, it actually sold out a month in advance, the first show. So then the venue wanted to add another show. So I ended up doing two when I was home for the holidays. It was kind of

the plan with doing it in St. Louis first. So was like, okay, this is the first time on its feet. Cause my whole trajectory was I'll do this and I'll do the show in different places. And eventually it's going to be the, my flea bag on TV. Right. So I was like doing it in St. Louis first gives me a safe space to do it. Cause it's so smart. Mostly friends and family, people who love me. Right. Also, I knew I could sell out at least one show.

because I'm so lucky that I have such a supportive base of people in my life. So I knew I'd be able to sell out at least one show. So then I'd be able to take that to venues back here and be like, hey, I did this show and it sold out. And to be able to get that feedback. Well, my biggest takeaway, even after watching it, like, because they were, I got the recording and even watching it, I was watching it I'm like, I feel like I'm watching two different shows. Like, it's like I'm in standup mode and then I'm in like storytelling.

mode, right? Because the original iteration was very much like, this is the Maria show. It's like very cabaret-ish. I'm standing up here as Maria talking to the audience. And so when I recognized that and like the different feedback I got, that helped me kind of morph it into the iteration that it is. And I'd love to hear the story. I know it's kind of a funny story of how you got into

Hollywood Fringe. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. I like was researching all these festivals. I was literally just pressing buttons and it was like, click here for more information. I was like, OK. And it was like, put in this info and then click here for more information. And I was like, OK. And that kept going until it was like, congratulations, you've submitted your show to the Hollywood Fringe Festival. And I was like, huh? I did what?

You thought you were just getting information, but you actually submitted it. I accidentally submitted my show to the Hollywood Fringe Festival and I was like, this is cute. Like, maybe like this is a fun thought. Like, maybe. But I don't know. I I'm sure it's like super competitive to get a venue and like I'll come back to this later. And then the next day I was literally walking into therapy and I'm still in St. Louis at this point and.

I have all these emails from Hollywood Fringe and I'm like, what? And it was like venues being like, congratulations on your show. Like we saw you submitted your show. We'd love for you to consider us for your venue. And I'm like, what? And my therapist is like, this is a sign. You need to do this. You need to do this.

And I kind of had it on the back burner because I was like, I can't afford this. Like, I was like, I can't afford to do this. And then I was talking to my friend about it, who he's from L.A. and was like, no, we're going to do this. I'll like be your producer and I'll help you pay for it. We're going to do it. And I was like. OK, the universe conspiring to help you like, OK, I guess we're doing it.

And then you did it. Like you you adjusted your show. Tell us how you changed up your show to feel more like in line with one story. One of my friends here, Ramoy, who's I've seen. I don't know. I've always like been a fan of like his brain and his creative work. And so he said he wanted to help. And I was like, OK. And so we were like basically going back and forth on the Google doc of the script. And he was like.

I've been thinking about your relationship to the audience a lot. And he's like, hear me out. What if the audience is your new therapist? And it just made everything, again, everything just like clicked, like, especially with the ending. And like, I was like, my God, this is perfect. Like an aha moment kind of thing. It's so specific.

I love that, like what you're sharing for anyone out there who wants to make their own show, it's that it's great to have feedback from others and it can only help you and it's a really important part of the process and him giving you that advice like really resonated with you. He could have said something that didn't and it's always your call. But the fact that this was like an aha moment that made everything just so specific and clear for the audience. I love it. Yeah. No, I knew I needed that because I was so

in it at that point. It was the exact thing that I needed. was like, yes. Like, all just like snapped into place. From your experience going to Hollywood Fringe and creating the show, it's kind of a whirlwind of a year and a half. What advice would you give to other people who want to create a show or participate in a festival? Any key takeaways from that festival process that you think you wish you would have known?

I wish I would have known how realistic it is to get an audience at a festival. I wish I would have known with this particular festival, they like most fringe festivals have a built in audience that like the community there looks forward to the friend that fringe festival every year. That was not the case with this one. Like I went from selling out two shows in St. Louis.

to my biggest house for the festival was 15 people. One show, I had two people in the audience and leading up to this, like I thought like that was like my worst fear, right? Like I was like, my God, like how mortifying as a performer. I explained it like it was almost like exposure therapy for me because that whole day I'm like.

We should just cancel this show like this, like this is stupid to be doing this. And then right before I'm like, well, I'm going to give these two people the best show they've ever seen. And I felt like really good about the show that I did. And afterwards, they were both like, we forgot we were the only two people in here. It felt like a full house. And then I related and felt everything you were feeling. And I was like.

this is why I'm doing this. And it ended up being one of my favorite shows that I did was for the two people. And so I feel like that's one of my pieces of advice. If you could do that and walk through that as a performer, I truly feel like I can do anything now. I had to do such mental gymnastics through this experience, like to get myself to a place where I'm like, okay, I have 10 people in the house. I got those 10 people there because I went there knowing no one.

Like there's 400 other shows going on. Those 10 people are there because I got them there and I'm like really proud of that and I'm gonna give them the best show that they've ever seen. Just in life in general, you have to go through things that scare you or else you're not gonna change. Like you're not gonna grow. Yes, everything you're saying like resonates and inspires me honestly, cause I know like producers here in New York, we know the stress.

of just trying to get people to our shows here in the city where we live because we do shows a lot and then, you you can't have all your friends come to all your shows or you have to build a community of people and that's a stress I carry. And you really inspired me when you said, hey, I did a show for two people and I said, I'm going to give them the best show of my life. And that's such a positive attitude to have. other thing that always kept me going and that I always had to and just even still like when I'm like on this journey.

with this show is always go back to the why. Like always go back when in doubt, when you're like in fear mode, when you're like second guessing everything, always go back to the why. Like why am I doing this? And that's what I always had to go back to. And for me, it's because, you know, I have a certain message in my show. Like I had, there's a trigger warning in my show because, you know, at the end of the day, it is like a fun, funny.

musical comedy show about like how dating sucks. But at the core of it, it's really how like women walk through the trauma we experience and how that can manifest itself in different ways. And so and all the women, especially after the first couple shows in St. Louis, who said I felt seen, I relate so much like that's my why. And that is what carried me through.

and continues to carry me through why I'm doing this. like, you know, again, with those two women who were like, I felt everything you were feeling. And I was like, this, this is why. I love that. That's super reaffirming for you too, that people are getting your why. And I want to talk about what's next for this show, even though this podcast episode will probably air after, but tell us the next steps for I've Grown Plenty Things. So,

Well, we did the realities show the second time at caveat and you had suggested you were like, I really think this place would be great for your show. And I think they'd be really interested in it. And I was like, OK. So I had like, you know, reached out to venues and I did them and I like sent them my pitch and all that stuff. And then they responded that they'd love to host it. So.

It's happening September 15th, 5 p.m. at Caveat. So I'm doing my show in New York. I love it. That's so exciting. I do want to segue into the cat portion. Yay. So when you moved in with me back in 2018, 2019, think the beginning. Yeah. Right at the beginning. Yep. You lived, I had

been newly divorced and, well, not newly divorced. I'd been divorced for a few years and I had lived there and I needed a roommate to keep the apartment. I have two cats and you moved in and you weren't like necessarily, you loved animals, but you weren't a cat person and you, so you didn't have patches at the time. Can you tell us what happened? What led you to patches? It's one of my favorite stories to tell. So like you said, I moved to New York. I, we'd always had dogs growing up, like my family.

It's not like we didn't like cats. We just didn't know cats. And I've always been a huge animal lover in general. So I've always been very drawn to animals. So I didn't dislike cats. I just didn't like, no, I didn't know how they worked. I didn't know, you know, what do you do? How do you pet them? You know, like stuff like that. And I moved in with you and you had two cats. And I remember just like when I went over to see your apartment.

When I visited before I moved, Lionel came up and rubbed up on me. And I remember you were like, you were like, he's usually not that friendly right away. And I was like, yay. And then I remember being so surprised because what I did know about cast is they take a little longer to warm up to people. But Lionel and Luna were pretty into me, pretty.

Pretty immediately. You know, there's some truth to people saying that like cats go towards the non-cat people in the room the most sometimes because you're not like all up in their space and trying to bother them. You're just being chill and they're like feel safe around you because you're not staring at them and they're coming to you. So they feel like safe on their terms and they really did like you. I was nervous because Lionel can be a little he doesn't like everybody. Sure. happy.

I mean, Same. Exactly. Neither do I. I don't expect him to like everybody. He's a cat. exactly. Exactly. But yeah, they especially Luna, like Luna would start like crawling up on me. remember one of the first times she was like on me, like started making biscuits on me. And I had no idea what that was. And I was texting one of my best friends who's obsessed with cats. And I'm like.

What's happening? She sounds like a motorboat. do I did something wrong? She's like, no, that means she loves you. means she's comfortable. And I was like, I'm so glad. And, and yeah, they would like sleep with me sometimes. were like my main source of companionship for like the first several months that I lived in New York. Like I loved her. I still love them. I love them so much. And so

That was my first cat exposure. And then I went to my next apartment in Brooklyn with Lisa and Letta and Lisa had a cat named Whiskey. And it was the same thing. Like, she's like very picky about who she's. I remember when I was adopting Patches, like they like call for references, you know, and they called Lisa and they were like.

She was like, no, my cat hates everyone and she loves Maria. Like she would sleep with her. Like, and she hates most people. And you just have good like cat person energy or like for that. Yeah. I mean, it was for me, it was so good because I was dating my now husband, Alan, and I lived in Astoria and he lived in Bushwick and I was, he had a cat as well.

And so I would spend the night sometimes and I never worried about the cats being lonely because I knew that you were there like keeping them comfort. That was a win for me. Yeah. yeah. No, it was the perfect setup because I didn't mind taking care of them at all. It was like nice to do. You know, I was like in New York for the first time by myself. So there were a lot of feelings involved in that. So like having them there and.

It was great. And yeah, and basically the same exact thing happened in the next apartment because we had whiskey and then Jerry came along and they were both obsessed with me. And it became this thing that like every apartment I went to, the person's cat became obsessed with me and to the point where one of my friends who I didn't live with, who was the same thing with her cat. But at that point I had known I had like picked up on the fact that if you walk in and you don't like

go up on them, they'll come to you. And if you like basically ignore them. And so I knew that because she has a cat who is. my gosh, what's it called? A care a carrot, care correct cat. I'm not sure. C.A.R. O.T. my gosh. I'm not as familiar. Is this a certain breed of cat? Yeah, it's about she was in the Peace Corps in Thailand.

and yeah, brought him over from there. And so he has a very like certain temperament. so I research this and put it in the show notes. Yeah, he's great. He has like little things. He has two different colored eyes and which I learned she taught me is actually one has just has a big freckle on it. Yeah.

So, but anyway, I knew he had a certain temperament and so I very specifically when I walked in, ignored him and then he became obsessed with me and I would cat sit him all the time. Anyway, when I had my last roommate before I moved here by myself, he had a cat named Martin and my God, I loved Martin so much and she was like, have you told your new roommate yet that you're a cat stealer?

became like the thing. so when I finally got my own apartment, like everyone's like, OK, so when are you going to get your own cat? Yeah, now's the time. No roommates. You need a cat. Exactly, exactly. And I originally on my lease, it says no pets, but I formed such a great relationship with my landlords that I asked about the cat and they were like, yeah, absolutely. And so then

The search began to find patches. When was that? Remind me like what year was it when you were getting patches? It was my birthday of 2022. Wow. So you had only lived here three years. It took, right? I guess it took you three years. And then you, how did you choose patches specifically? So it was actually because of Martin, because I loved Martin so much and I was, he was such a sweet boy.

He would like sleep and cuddle with me. I my God, I just loved him so much. And so I was kind of like in the back of my mind, like looking for one that like look reminded me of him. And when I first saw patches on Petfinder, he reminded me of Martin looks wise. And so that's what made me click on him. And then in his bio, it said.

If you're looking for a lap cat, look no further. And like talked about how like cuddly he is and stuff. I was like, yes, perfect. And he is super cuddly. Like he's super affectionate. Cause when I've been over, he's very friendly. And yeah, tell me more about his personality. I was trying to see. Usually he's like crawling all over me, but he's like super passed out right now. there he is. I think is that his belly?

Yeah, that's his belly. That's his belly. He like cuddles with his toys. It's really cute. That's so cute. And he the main, I guess, thing that you deal with with him is he's very like wants to be with you all the time. Yes, he's he's not quite like other cats. Of course, I ended up with a very special cat. Like you said, he's very personable, like he doesn't get scared.

When people come over, like he'll like run under the bed and immediately loop around and come say hello. He loves being around people. He does not like being alone, which is like crazy to me because most cats do. Yeah. Yeah. And you can't get a second cat in your, your only, they made an exception for you to have one. Right. And I live in a basement. Like it's, know, there's not a lot of windows so that like makes it

difficult to or else he like I would totally get him a friend in a heartbeat because you can tell he he really does not like being alone and then even when I get a cat sitter like they say like they can tell that he misses me and so it's like it's really difficult I'm like I didn't think I'd end up with a cat that has like attachment

But he does he's like it's so it's like a whole thing when I leave like he just like gets excited and goes up to the door and then realizes I'm leaving and he's like All right, I'll go And it's like the saddest thing every freaking day

That's so hard for you. I know. It breaks my heart every time. like, Mommy has to go to work to pay for your life. Literally, someone has to pay for your life. Like, you're not paying rent. You're not contributing to rent. So that's the hardest part. And then he's very he loves to wake me up several times in the morning. He used to do it.

all night and in the morning, but like he'll start meowing like it's gotten earlier now. It's like four something a.m. and he only eats wet food. everyone's like, get the automatic feeder. And I'm like, he doesn't eat dry food. He only eats wet food. So that's honestly been the hardest part is like, I don't think I've had a normal night sleep since I got him. I do know my friend, Karina, cause I cat sat for her. She has.

automatic feeder for wet food, but you have to put like a little ice thing under it. So I'll see if I can get the link, because I also have a cat just under, I have one only on wet food and I've wondered about that. I'll get you the link, because it looks like you just have to have an ice tray under it so that it keeps it fresh and cool until the little thing pops open. please. That's something that I feel like this podcast can explore, like people who are artists or creatives or work at night.

just having, you know, hectic schedules in New York and like, talking about it and seeing if we can also find some like solutions when I have experts on talking about how we can enrich and provide them enrichment. But you know, we still have to run around and do things and we live in small spaces. It's so hard because I feel like a terrible cat mom a lot of the time because I can see when he's like sad and depressed and like, and

you know, he wants more windows so we could go out in the hall so he can look out the screen door. And I let him like sit at the door. But you know, I can tell when he's like sad. And so I'm like, I'm a terrible mom. No, just the fact that you care so much and you're so attuned to his emotions and his like behaviors speaks volumes. And I was going to ask if you have any special rituals with him. And it sounds like walking into the hallway to let him like

Get more light is a nice ritual that I'm sure he really enjoys. is. He loves he loves going into the hallway. He like does the zoomies up and down it and then he'll like go up the stairs and he'll He'll actually when I go to like the grocery store or something, he'll go out there and protest and sit at the top of the stairs and be like, no, you're not going to the store. But when we're doing it out of fun, he'll like do the zoomies and then he just sits at the door. But he wants me to sit there with him and.

look outside with him because sometimes I'll try to like do it and then like do the dishes or something but he'll be like no you need to come look out with me. And I know you've like you've taken him to the vet have you ever asked the vet about his personality like what do they say are they just like or is it not really their concern because it's he's healthy it's just yeah pretty much they're like they they sometimes they'll tell me the things that everyone like suggests you know like

But yeah, no, it's pretty much just like, yeah, sounds about right. I'm like, okay, thanks for the help. Yeah, it's like with the men that you date, you've found many that are emotionally unavailable, but you have a very emotionally available cat. He's very attached to me.

I can't find a man to want a relationship with me for anything, but this one is the opposite. He is a attached AF. I love that. That's a funny way of like tying it all together with your solo show and with Pash's. So now I want to ask you some for your own, I guess, favorite tip. And it could be a cat care tip, something that you've learned that as a cat parent.

or another tip for people who want to get into like performing nightlife, whether that's singing, like cabaret comedy like you, or what you've observed from like the burlesque scene, because I know you've sung in burlesque shows. So, a tip or two. Yeah. Cat tip. I would just say like what I was saying before about how he picks up when I'm stressed, because I can get...

I'm sure you really like I can get like really like frazzled and like stressed easily. And then when he like starts, then I get and it's just like, it could be a lot. So I try to remember that like he's picking up on whatever I'm picking up. so, I know this is a good one. This is my therapist actually gave me this when we were doing inner child because we do a lot of inner child work.

And this so this has helped with myself and it's helped with him as she's like whenever you're taking care of patches, like think about it as you're also taking care of like your younger self. I love that. like when even when I'm just like petting him or like, you know, and like feeding it like a basic care things or even, you know, I'm it really helps both ways because I'm.

making sure I'm going out of my way to like, you know, play with him and like do the stuff, you know, that he needs. But it's also like tending to like my younger self, because that's like the core of most things therapy for especially for us millennials. So, yeah, I like thinking about that because it helps both parties a lot. I love that. And that also I feel like that made me think of something.

but now I can't quite recall. But just that you're giving him love, you're giving yourself love, and it's like good vibes all around. how old is Patches? That's what I wanted to ask you. he, you know, he's five. I think I figured it out because I have two different birthdays for him. I really just do his gotcha day, which is January 23rd.

but his vet like sends me a birthday card like in the middle of June sometime. And I'm always like, wait, what? And I remember being like, again, I'm like, I'm a terrible mother. I don't even know my cat's actual birthday. No, I feel like I don't know my cat's actual birthday. I know when I adopted them and about how old they were. But yeah, I hear Exactly. So he's about five because pretty much when you adopt, I feel like you never really know how old they actually are. They're like, they're about this old, you know.

So he's about five. Well, hopefully because he's still young that maybe his like, he'll kind of mellow out even a little more as the years go on and like not be as like, I need you all the time now. Exactly. That's what I'm hoping. What am I actually my friend who helps me with the show, Ramoy has cat sat for me a couple of times and he's like been

kept him up all night, like, meowing and wanting me. And I'm like, I'm so sorry. And he's like, no, he's like still got that kitten energy. He's like, he'll grow up. I'm like, thank you for making me feel better. exactly. I'm so glad you have a good like cat person friend who's your cat sitter who understands. And then I guess before we wrap up, it's been so wonderful. Just I wanted to make sure I mentioned that you have performed at the Cat Beret.

so many times singing and then also you were part of reality's burlesque, Vanderpump rules burlesque show. And so anything, I feel like I've seen a bit of a transformation in you and myself since we've discovered the world of like nightlife variety shows and being part of like the burlesque scene, even though I know you don't perform burlesque, you're in burlesque shows. So how has that kind of like affected you?

Well, when we were doing the photo shoot for the Vanderpump show, I remember the gal taking our pictures. Who's a burlesque performer. I did something like I like opened my blazer or something. She's like, I give it a year before you're doing burlesque. like, who knows? Who knows? But one, I would definitely say it's a hundred percent made me feel more like my true authentic self, because, know,

Performers will understand, like, especially when you're just like going to auditions and you're doing like tape after tape after tape, you almost like lose a sense of self. And like I mentioned before, like you kind of lose the why, right? Like you just kind of I'm like, I got to a point where I was like, I don't even remember like what it's like to actually like perform. And like I lost that like connection to like the passion and like why I do this. And so getting to do like

Cat Beret and Prime, our friend in our actor group's burlesque show. getting to do performances like that, it's helped me remember my passion for performing and really feel like my most authentic self. have more creative freedom to really express and kind of find my own voice.

And that's my advice that I would give is to have, make sure you have a community, like make sure you have some sort of community and support if you're, especially if you're doing this, because like, I wouldn't have done my show if it wasn't for our actor group. Like I wouldn't have performed in half the things I performed in if it wasn't for our actor group. Like it's like,

so paramount and important to have that group that of course you can like that you get support from that also you can like be accountable with and you can bounce ideas off of and if you're in like if you're hitting a wall Here like they could be like what about this? You know, it's like it's been so paramount for me and I truly wouldn't be

where I am with everything if it wasn't for our actor group that you started. I'm gonna make this one of the social media clips. Yes, as you should. love that you say that because clearly I completely agree that it's so great to have a community of people who are supportive and you can be accountable to and really see each other setting goals and making them happen only inspires everyone else and gives confidence that I can set goals and make things happen too.

Exactly, exactly. That's the biggest piece of advice I would have just in general. then kind of like what I was saying before with the festival, but it's so the same with this kind of stuff is just like if you're like scared, it probably means you should do it. So like I feel like I was always so inspired by your experience with getting into burlesque and stuff. It's like if you're scared, you should probably do it. Like, you know, it's going to like.

help you grow, which is hilarious because my show is I've grown plenty of things, but that's because all the things in my life have come from like walking through these really uncomfortable, scary things. And it's helped me grow so much as a person to the point where I'm like, I'm a little tired of this. Can we like enough? But but in reality, it's like, yeah, that's what gets us to where we are. So like do like if it sounds crazy.

Like do it, try it, you know, you never know like what's gonna click for you and help you like find your voice and you know, your pantry. and you might have that fear, because I know exactly the fear you're talking about, because I experience that whenever I say I'm gonna do this new thing and then I dive into it, you'll be scared, but then you'll do it and you'll feel so great and empowered and proud of yourself and be like, I wanna do it again or do the next thing.

Totally. Exactly. And I also love what you said about community because I would love for this podcast to be a community of creatives. Yeah, who love cats and maybe we can grow from here and also have like a Patreon where people can chat and collaborate and share like cat tips and performer tips. So I'm really excited to hear you say yes. And that's absolutely what this should be. And that was the other thing I wanted to say is like

This is the perfect example of like being a performer who, you know, it's like, okay, this isn't happening here. Let's do this. Cause you know, you started this podcast, you were originally trying to do it for, you know, get it picked up as a show and you were like, all right, well, this isn't like going. So let's do this. And I'm like, hell yeah, that's amazing.

Yeah, I feel like if one thing you try it and it you're figuring out it doesn't work Maybe you're meant to go in a different direction and so for all our listeners Maria Tell us where they can find you and connect with you. So you can find me on Instagram It's so difficult is my last name is Difficult, but my Instagram is Maria underscore Bartolotta be

B-A-R-T-O-L-O-T-T-A underscore one, which is an inside joke from college, because when I was in college and we'd like have to do auditions, I'd always sign up to be first. And so I'd go Maria Bartolotta, number one. And so that was everyone's imitation of me was Maria Bartolotta, number one. So it's a play on that. So Maria underscore Bartolotta, underscore one. And then you can find me on TikTok on

at AveMaria869. Nice! Okay, well thank you so much for being here on Tales and Tassels today and give Patches a big hug from me. I definitely will. let, he heard, must have heard you talking about him because he got up and laid down here next to me. But thank you so much for having me. This was so fun. I'm so glad you're doing it.

And that's a wrap for this episode of Tales and Tassels. So if you have any questions, comments, or just want to say meow, feel free to send us an email at talesandtasselspod at gmail.com. Thank you for listening. And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast. Also, join our community on Instagram at Tales and Tassels Pod for more updates and behind the scenes fun. See you next time, kitty cats.